NEWS 24 JANUARY 2005

BLUE MONDAY:MOST DEPRESSING DAY OF THE YEAR
Scientists have calculated that today, the fourth Monday of the new year, is the most depressing day of the year due to the combination of weather elements, Christmas debts beginning to take effect and the general ad nauseam of a lack of events to look forward to post-Christmas.

ANOTHER EXPLOSION IN BAGHDAD
A blast in Central Iraq has injured another ten people, seemingly as a pre-election threat for next Sunday’s voting. Is it really worth it?

WETHERSPOONS TO BAN SMOKING IN THEIR PUBS
Wetherspoons is to ban smoking in its chain of bars and pubs from May 2006 onwards. It will match the high levels of hygiene that you already find in Wetherspoons establishments.

HOWARD TO UNVEIL ASYLUM CURBS
So as a gesture/effort to win votes, this really is curb crawling.